I can’t get this one song out of my mind. It keeps repeating over and over. I can see the dancing, the smiles, the happy faces, the love. It was a wedding video. Three years ago. The beautiful bride was 28 years old then. Fast forward to this year, she graduated this past Spring as a doctor, internal medicine, and was five months pregnant. Suddenly she didn’t feel well and just two months later she passed away, leaving an amazing family, a wonderful husband, and loving friends. She was my niece’s good friend and they graduated from medical school together. My niece was devastated along with everyone else.
I heard that the memorial mass was held at the same church where the young lady was married. Standing room only with an hour or more wait to get inside. “I can only imagine,” I told my niece. “You know me,” my sister said, “I am not a crier.” But this one, this time, I did. We talked about the young woman’s mom and grandmother for a few minutes. They are lovely ladies. Striking looking, confident, caring, joyful, filled with love. “Like most mothers and grandmothers,” I said. And we both got quiet again. Thinking, pondering, praying, I believe.
Then I broke the silence and said, “Life is too short. We have to make every moment count.” I shared what has been going on in the United States borders with immigrant families being separated. They had heard on the news, everyone has. But, listening about the plight, the marches, the separating families, the reunions that are taking so long, the children’s trauma, their moms desperation, the need for translators, in Spanish and other dialects, and most recently, the meds that are being given to the children to keep them quiet or behaving, my niece, the doctor who is a pediatrician, she was appalled. Those kinds of drugs should not be given to small children or children at all! We think of the kids, the ones still waiting, still crying, still scared. Who is consoling them? And the moms and dads? They have to be feeling so helpless…. They have to be hysterical! That’s how I would be, beside myself with grief. Just like a parent who loses her child… forever.
(Marcus Yam / Los Angeles Times)
I told them that while I was in Puerto Rico with them to celebrate our 90-year-old dad/granddad, a group of my immigrant activist friends were in Texas helping and supporting all the moms and dads that have been separated from their children. I shared what they were seeing and living for that one week, the traumatic stories of separation, the hopelessness yet the caring, love and support and, yes the motivation, las fuerzas, the strength they brought along to help them keep fighting for their children.
I shared what my immigration lawyer friend, Carolina Rubio-MacWright, witnessed while she was in Texas. “What we found was even worse than what the media has been reporting. Children unimaginably tortured and left with lifelong traumas, while mothers were left unable to exercise their due process because of the anxiety of not knowing where their kids were and when they could see them. Yet, their resilience, drive and determination; that was incredible to see.”
My niece, who at 30 is wise beyond her years, then said, “Titi, you write about language and culture, but a mother’s love has no language and no culture. Those families still have a chance of being reunited, all of them. We must all do something to make that happen. For mothers who have lost their children and never again will get to embrace their children, like my friend’s mom.”
Copyright Reuters
“My friend agrees with you”, I told my niece. “We have to help these immigrant mothers fight for their children’s safety and ensure they are rightfully granted asylum. It is our duty. We must register to vote, join calls, sign petitions and get involved in our communities because family separation is happening daily. Our voice matters!”
Today, many young people like my niece are passionate about injustices and are getting involved. They are showing up! In that spirit and for all those families that are desperately trying to be a family again, I urge you to join the cause. Below are some places where you can get the latest information and find out how you can help.
For all those parents that can’t anymore. Be their voice!
Here are a few online resources you can visit for ideas on how to take action:
- Facebook – Carolina Macwright
- Moms Rising
- Mamás Con Poder
- Add your name to a petition demanding justice for separated families
Bai Bai for now,
Maritere
